Sat 9 Nov 2019
Quite how the people of the City of Corinth in Greece ended up establishing a team in South Leeds is lost in the sands of time. Perhaps the Apostle Paul wrote a lost third letter to the Corinthians instructing a move North to play rugby in Yorkshire?
The Greeks started brightly. Although Danny Pollard charged down a Greek clearance kick, Baildon were unable to capitalise. Worryingly the home side's line out spluttered, owing more to Homer Simpson than the epic poetry of Homer’s Iliad. Baildon were soon under pressure from a wicked chip that drew a handling error and gave the Greeks an attacking scrum. Will Quisling Craven, an ex Baildon player whose excessive use of Grecian 2000 necessitated a move to Corinthians, picked up at number eight and distributed the ball right, getting the Baildon defenders moving that way. With the sort of subtle deception that had the citizens of Troy welcoming large wooden horses within their defensive walls, the ball was cleverly switched back left where Baildon were short. The Greek 11 scuttled over in the corner. (0-5)
Further Greek endeavour deserved points as an overlap of Olympian proportions was created, but Baildon line speed forced the sort of loose pass that you would usually only see after a night involving too much Ouzo. Matty Dixon pounced on the ball and set off 60 metres, stepping a Greek and dotting down under the sticks. Conversion Jake Duxbury. (7-5)
Unfortunately Dixon pulled a groin performing a Syrtaki in an over-elaborate try scoring celebration and joined the long list of Baildon injured players.
Josh Crazy Legs Strauss penetrated (not in that way) the Greeks and a grubber kick pinned the visitors back in their own 22. Baildon earned a penalty attempt on goal, but the kick drifted wide.
Dan Cookson, Crazy Legs, James O’Ryan, Matty Robinson, Pete Lowth and Harrison Strauss all tormented the Greeks but were unable to score. Baildon pressure earned penalties and rather than take points the scrum option was taken not once, but twice. With Sam “Titan” Thompson called up, Baildon clearly felt that they had the edge at scrum time. Despite prolonged pressure, Greek resistance held firmer than an over-cooked lamb souvlaki. Finally pressure was relieved when a Baildon played became isolated and gave away a penalty for holding on.
When the Greeks worked back into Baildon territory a silly offside gave the Greeks a chance to reduce their deficit. Greek debt is, however, resistant to more than just the IMF and the kick didn’t quite have the legs.
In the last minute of the half Baildon resumed their epic Odyssey into Greek territory. James O’Ryan and Luke Strauss both chased kicks. A Danny Pollard kick was touched in flight by a Greek hand, giving Baildon an attacking line out. Good work by Jake Duxbury and Joe Robinson drew a penalty and Duxbury took the points with the last kick of the half. (10-5 HT)
From the restart Luke Strauss made a break. Rolling back the years Phil “Hercules” Wilson was the first support player to arrive. Baildon kicked but the support runner was taken off the ball. Jake Duxbury’s penalty attempt hit the cross piece and the ball bounced teasingly back into play. The Baildon support runners were there first and a Greek player clamped on to prevent the score. Duxbury made no mistake with the easy shot in front of the posts. (13-5)
Baildon might have had more as Harrison Strauss looked to dribble the ball down the pitch. Ollie Murphy did good work but inexplicably Baildon dithered in the mid field, unsure whether to kick, pass or run…..and in the end doing none of these.
An interception was then compounded by Baildon straying offside and gifting the Greeks easy points. (13-8)
The Greek full back increasingly began to show his class. Breaking tackles, launching elusive runs and clever kicks as though he wore winged sandals.
With Dan Fletcher proving as adept as George Morris at pilfering opposition ball, Baildon's lineout had real edge. A Tom Craven turnover earned a Baildon penalty kicked by Jake Duxbury, making it a two score game as the skies darkened with Nyxian hue. (16-8)
Hermes, for this was surely the name of the Corinthian fullback, now took a kick on the run and set off with great endeavour. Beautiful play set up a five on two overlap and the Greeks crossed in the corner. With four and a half minutes remaining on the clock the difficult conversion kick was good. (16-15)
Surely all Baildon needed to do was to play out the match deep in Greek territory? Baildon did better, great hands saw Danny Pollard heading to the line. Pollard drew the last defender superbly and timed his pass to perfection. Jake Duxbury was in at the corner but the conversion was wide. (21-15)
Credit to the Greeks, with the game clock showing red they recycled the ball and battered the Jenny Lane fortress, eventually crossing in the other corner. The conversion would win the game. The kick looked good but, by Castor and Pollux, the Gods can be cruel: the kick bouncing off the upright. (21-20 FT)
Elysium Fields feasting on honey and lotus flowers for the home side; a Greek Tragedy for the visitors.
There had been some debate in committee about replacing the sticks, but the right upright has now been renamed The Corinthian Column and has entered the mythology* of Baildon storytelling.
Player of the match was between Phil Wilson and James O’Ryan, Phil got the nod from the Greeks.
Many thanks to Leeds Corinthians for a great game of rugby that could have gone either way and where we definitely rode our luck, making use of home field advantage.
The Second XV came away with a narrow loss to local rivals Keighley on their AGP. Well done to all who travelled.
Thanks to our match officials, supporters and volunteers. Tom Parnell (on the sick list following removal of neck lump rumoured to be an extra testicle) was especially vocal with helpful interjections.
A special thanks to our sponsors who had gathered as guests of honour for this match. We were delighted that it was such an entertaining game of rugby.
After the match Tony Little was recognised for his 61 years (I know he doesn't look old enough - there are rumours Tony started playing for Baildon as a foetus) of contribution to Baildon Rugby with the rarely bestowed Honorary Life Membership. Brilliant Tony and very well deserved.
(*NB A poor understanding of Greek Mythology is your reporter’s Achilles Elbow.)
